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F1: And then he said…

So, what just happened, again?

Well, first of all Alonso said he was glad Raikkonen won the title and wouldn’t it be embarrassing if Hamilton did. And then Hamilton turned around and agreed with him. And Ferrari are having a big old love-in with Alonso, and a right go at Hamilton, which is jolly peculiar seeing as they just re-signed Massa and it’s presumably therefore too late for them to sign Alonso, unless this is Todt and Montezemolo at each other’s throats again, like it was last year with Raikkonen versus Schumacher for the lead drive, when it was Montezemolo who got his own way, and Todt has been a bit reticent about his future plans, now you come to mention it, and then there’s Ross Brawn on his sabbatical, and he’s pretty sorely missed, isn’t he? So who knows what will happen now.


And Kimi Raikkonen was actually seen to smile without his face cracking, and Flavio Briatore is still busily stirring up trouble in hopes of getting Alonso back to Renault, and who can blame him really, except surely that car’s not going to be competitive, especially given how strong Red Bull and BMW are looking, and you have to wonder if this is why they are hanging onto Fisichella, because at least he’s proved he can cope with Alonso’s ego. And, I tell you who won’t like this very much, and that’s Nelson Piquet Jr, he thought he was a shoo-in for that drive, and now Kovalainen’s got his act together, so they’ve got an embarrassment of riches at Renault already, wouldn’t you say? Meanwhile, Alonso and McLaren are staring at each other to see who’s going to blink first over Alonso’s contract, and everyone is backing Nico Rosberg as his replacement, although personally we would counsel keeping an eye on the whereabouts of Jenson Button, and McLaren have said they will make a decision in the next two weeks. And they could certainly do with a bit of Germanic coolness, couldn’t they, because these Latin drivers just don’t seem to settle there.

Also, there’s this matter of whether or not Hamilton put his car into neutral, which he says he did, and McLaren says he didn’t, and everyone in the whole world hates McLaren these days, and says they are desperate, and calling them sore losers, except for Damon Hill who thinks the FIA needs to “show some consistency”, and you’d have to say he’s got a point, wouldn’t you? Oh yes, and then we’re about to find out exactly how much hard cash the FIA get to screw out of McLaren over the Mike Coughlan affair, and everyone is wondering whether it’s true that Alex Wurz was given a big fat cheque by Toyota to get out of the car and make room for a Toyota protegé. That’s right, he is the guy who ran his mechanics over at Interlagos.

Why, what did you hear?

* “This is the story of two F1 teams, McLaren Mercedes and Scuderia Ferrari. These are the McLaren drivers, and these are from Ferrari, and this is F1 soap… keeping us all unreasonably entertained well into the off-season.”

Make sure you stay tuned to Brits on Pole for the next episode…


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